dec 2024 tbr and musings on fatigue, burnout, & goals (2024 reflections and mindset shifts)
- Me, My Shelf, & I
- Nov 30, 2024
- 5 min read
After coming back from my reading absence in 2020, I felt like there was so much I had missed out on. People were making YouTube videos about books, there were entire websites that contained mighty catalogs of every fathomable title and allowed you to track and review your reads, there were these new novelties called “special editions” that I was so envious of, and there were so many amazing sounding novels I wanted to know and get in on the conversations! Basically there was a ton of FOMO and I rapidly threw myself into the deep end and devoured everything I could.
Each year I like to make a little goal for myself–
2021: the year of reading new releases 2022: the year of backreading popular series 2023: the year of indulging into every impulse to re-read
2024: the year of reading down my physical TBR
While some of these have been more successful than others, I really think that I’ve been able to carry those habits forward. Especially when it comes to new releases and re-reads.
But these challenges aren’t the whole picture. One of the biggest changes to shape my reading journey occurred around early 2022 when I discovered the speed adjustment button on Libby. Hoo boy!
I’d previously been convinced that audiobooks were terrible and my very most despised format. Lo and behold, it’s the end of 2024 and despite more free time than ever before, audiobooks still seriously dominate the majority of my reads.
That said, I do find certain aspects of my reading that are missing a spark they had before. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this and while it’s difficult to say for certain where the blame lies, my two major theories are as follows:
When I first returned to reading not only did I have a smaller pool of read books to compare to, but I also had a greater pool of vetted and beloved reads to dig into. (By contrast, I now have many many books as comparisons, and read a ton of new releases that haven’t been vetted yet and will be forgotten and lost to the sands of time).
By a confluence of the covid pandemic, algorithms on websites such as TikTok and Reddit, and the mass adoption of AI, the stories being produced in the most recent years aren’t getting the time and attention and development to fully cook.
I started this year with the goal that I’d read down my physical TBR and clear out my NetGalley ARC commitments, but also told myself I wouldn’t spend time reading books I’m not interested in. Rather than reading all the suspected subscription box picks (because they could be pretty!) or finishing books because I already started (and sunk cost fallacy on the time already spent), I would put down a book if I wasn’t feeling it; no matter how early or how late.
So you’d think I’d have a higher yearly rating than ever before, right?
And yet… I think 2024 will be my lowest rated year yet.
Part of that is due to the high volume of reads (they can’t all be bangers) but you’d think it should balance out more with my commitment to reading better books for me, yeah? Somehow I feel like I’ve fallen in love with fewer books than ever before, and by percentage this definitely rings true.
But oh, how those fantastic reads shine!!
And I want more of those moments. I love finding a new favourite or hidden gem and shouting my love for that book to the world! I want to be obnoxious and tell all my friends about this fantastic little book that they just have to read!
I don’t know how to achieve that, or even if it’s a plausible goal, but I think in 2025 I want to slow down my reading. I’ve really loved writing in-depth reviews (even if I’m very bad about fully editing and publishing them) and want to spend more time slowing down and really digging into some books.
It’s really hard (really hard) to escape the Capitalist mindset I’ve grown up with– time is money and every moment should be used to peak efficiency. Combined with the speed and ADHD tool of audiobooks, it’s so gratifying to finish a book or two a day and watch that read count tick up. But I think it can also be a crutch. There are times where I don’t start a book I want because I won’t be able to finish it that same day, or prioritize finishing mediocre reads to achieve the satisfaction of completing something.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s served me really well and I’m grateful to have been able to read as much as I have. But sometimes I feel like it’s not just enabling my ADHD tendencies, but worsening them to a shorter and shorter attention span and lack of focus.
Life is a journey; reading is a journey; I’m not the same person nor reader that I was even a few short years ago. I’m proud of what I accomplished, and I love that I’ve broken free of my FOMO (both for pretty books and books-I-know-are-not-for-me-even-though-everyone-else-raves-about-them). But I think it’s a good time to start shaping new habits and where I want to see myself in the future.
Previously I was pretty stoked to maybe hit 500 books read in a year, but then life came at me fast the last month or two and it just wasn’t in the cards. And that’s okay; 450 is still going to be more than respectable (or however close I end up getting to it).
So I think December is going to be a little different than I’ve ever planned a TBR before, as I start to adopt this slower, deeper mindset and test the waters before the new year. I still have ~16 books on my physical TBR to finish, and I think I’ll complete about a half dozen of them. Whatever else is left I’ll take into January, and after that I might have to admit defeat as my interest clearly just isn’t there and it’s time to DNS/DNF and unhaul ‘em.
But more interestingly: I’m planning to re-read my favourites from this year and maybe do some reviews for them. I love picking out quotes and doing summaries and critically looking at and providing commentary for the text. I’ll also be (hopefully) reading some really thicc eARCs and getting back to my chonky-Fantasy-without-audiobooks roots.
So this is my December TBR! I've read all but the last title in the top 3 rows, as those are my favourites from this year. I'm planning to write some better quality reviews for them and possibly do a definitive ranking if it feels fun!
And these are the eARCs I'm most looking forward to reading!!:
So let me know-- what are you planning to read for December? Do you have any goals for the new year? How do you think your reading has changed over time?
Comments